The Rock Stars of Romance
  • Spotlights
  • Rock Report
  • New & Upcoming Releases
    • 2017 Releases
    • Featured New Releases
    • Featured Cover Reveal & Pre-orders
  • TRSoR Recomendations
  • List of Services
    • About >
      • TRSOR Promotions

Sneak Peek: #MOMFAIL by Shari J Ryan, A.M. Willard, Gia Riley, Carina Adams, Claudia Burgoa, Crystal Grizzard Burnette, Faith Andrews, J.A. Derouen, Leddy Harper, LK Collins

7/24/2017

Comments

 
#MOMFAIL is NOW LIVE and ONLY $0.99!  Inspired by true stories by authors who drink and swear.  Read the foreword and grab your copy!
Picture
FORWORD - Nicole Knepper, M.A., LCPC,
Author of Moms Who Drink and Swear,
Educator, and Epic Momfailure

Trigger alert: Some of the stories in this collection have hot as hell, graphic descriptions of sex. If your little cock blockers are currently preventing you from getting your boots knocked on the regular (or at all), I’m telling you right now that all the sexy talk is going to trigger twangs in your naughty bits, and you will probably want to jump your partner mid-sentence, even if you’ve been fanaticizing for weeks about smothering him (or her) with a pillow as they sleep through whatever bodily fluid related situation you are dealing with at Zero Dark Fucking Thirty. 

The stories in this collection ignited more than my loins. Many of them triggered the trapdoor of my hippocampus, and I fell into a tunnel full of memories about what life was like when my now “I want you to LEAVE ME ALONE” teenage offspring were “I WANT TO BE WITH YOOOOOOUUUUU even though your asshole is turning inside out, exploding into the toilet while you hurl into a bucket perched on your lap,” little ones. 

In 2005, due to circumstances that laughed at my life plans, it was necessary to put my career on the back burner and stay home with my then magnificently gorgeous, special needs newborn daughter and demanding, freakishly brilliant four-year-old son. The sick, coming out both ends, scenario happened more times than I can count during my five-year tenure as a stay at home mom. I still find it bizarre that neither of my kids ever noticed the scent of rotting death in the bathroom, yet they could smell the factory-sealed packages of M&M’s I had hidden in my tampon box under the bathroom sink. Jerks…

Full-time parenting was hard on my fragile nerves. It was not something I would have chosen because it seemed too boundary-less, too complicated, too everything. I failed and failed and failed again, but it wasn’t the mom fails that got to me. It was the fear of me failing myself by losing myself. I was terrified I might disappear under a mound of dirty clothes and bitterness like so many women I knew. Women who allowed the monotonous, isolating, thankless tasks to smite out their identity. I promised myself it wouldn’t happen to me. If cock was going to be blocked in my house, I was going to be the one to block it. *drops mic*

As one of the authors in this book so eloquently says, “Karma is an evil mistress.” I have two expert-level cock blockers (I kid you NOT, if there were a way to profit off of this skill, my kids would have been millionaires by the time they hit kindergarten) and there were many, many times when I woke up in the morning feeling bitter and empty, having forgotten that there was actually a time when I was someone other than a mother. But most of the time, the days were filled with laughter and lessons to learn, the majority of the lessons being ones I needed to learn, lessons that made me more of who I am and brought out the best of pre-motherhood Nicole. 

This book is full of failure. And hot sex. And there is one (totally understandable, in my opinion) accidental kidnapping. But it’s also packed with stories about growth, acceptance, recovery, harmony, humility, humor, and discovery. These mommas found success through their failures, and as a result became MORE of who they are, not less. What truly separates the winners and losers in life is not staying down when you fall, and since we all fall, this book provides a little motivation to get the fuck back up. Deep, huh? 
What’s That Smell – Shari J. Ryan

"Please put all electronic devices away as we are preparing to depart from the gate," the flight attendant announces.
I take my phone carefully out of Connor's hands, ready to replace it with a book and his toy cell phone that I've had smashed between my thigh and the wall beneath the window. "Can you call mommy?" I ask him as I slip my phone into my pocket.
He looks at me like I just took his one meal of the day away. The quiver in his lip starts, and I know what is about to happen. I swear to God, you have to be kidding me. "Connor, look, look at this new book I got for you. You love Winnie the Pooh!"
The cry starts as a quiet whine, and I'd love to break every rule and give him the damn phone back, especially seeing as this moron sitting beside me can't put his laptop away. He's probably not a jackass, but right now, he is because he gets to have his entertainment out and Connor doesn't. My two-year-old needs technology more than he does.
The flight attendant makes her last round down the aisle, checking everyone's seat belts and enforcing the no-technology rule. "Sir, you're going to need to place your laptop away until we are in the air."
Ha ha, you got in trouble. That's what you get for not following rules. "Sure thing," the businessman says, casually. "Can you also bring me a gin and tonic?" He hands the woman a twenty and winks at her.
"Of course, sir, we'll bring that out as soon as we're free to move around the cabin."
As if Connor is offended by this one flight attendant, he decides now is the time to turn his whining into a full-blown crying fit again, for the second time in twenty minutes.
The businessman looks over at us and reaches his finger out toward Connor. Instinctively, I wrap my arm around Connor, not wanting this stinky man's finger anywhere near his cheeks. "Cuchi cuchi coo," he says like a weirdo.
Connor, of course, screams louder because a stranger tried to talk to him. That's a big fat no here in the land of twenty-three months old. "Yikes, are you going to be able to quiet him down?" the jackass asks.
Jake clears his throat and smiles, that smile I'd be scared of if he looked at me the way he's looking at the man. "We’ll do what we can, but we don't have much control over our baby crying, so I guess it's up to fate now, huh?"
"Right," the guy says to Jake. As the engine rumbles to life and the wheels start turning, Connor thankfully calms down and rests his head against my chest, sighing as if he's giving up the fight. What the fight is, I don't know.
"There, he's okay," I tell Jake, hoping I’m right.
"Good thing we didn't give him Benadryl. Right, Babe?" Jake mocks me.
I look at him blankly for a minute. "I may have given him a little," I mutter.
"You horrible, horrible mother, you," he says, laughing. "I thought it was bad parenting to do such a terrible thing as that?"
"Shush," I tell him.
"He'll probably be asleep in minutes," Jake says.
I try to breathe calmly in and out several times in fear of making a scene. I hate giving Connor anything that isn't necessary, but I didn't know which would be worse...Connor awake during turbulence, or in a Benadryl coma. I'd rather be knocked out instead of enduring turbulence though, so there we have it.
"Bankie?" Connor asks.
I reach around him and pull his blanket out of the bag and hand it to him, wrapping him up snugly. "Do you want to go night-night?" I ask him.
His eyelids start to close as he nuzzles his head into me.
"Told you," Jake says.
"Great prediction, smarty," I jest.
"It's fine; you can tell me I'm right, later."
"Don't count on it," I argue.
* * *
Connor has been asleep for a full ninety minutes, making it halfway to Florida without a peep. So far, so good. I guess this isn't so bad after all.
"Babe," Jake says, nudging me in the shoulder.
I've had my eyes closed, but I'm only resting in fear of Connor waking up with wrath. 
"Mmm?" I groan.
"Do you smell that?"
Being a mouth breather when I'm half asleep, I hadn't noticed any smell. "No, what?" I inhale through my nose while feeling the hairs on my arm stand at attention. "What the hell is that?" I whisper. "Did someone fart?"
 
You’re Mom Does What – Faith Andrews

Panting moans and slapping skin permeated the steamy truck. I palmed the clenched muscles of his firm ass, urging him to plunge into me to the hilt. Deep. Hard. Unapologetic.
“Shit, Jessa. You’re not what I expected.” His gravelly admission brought a wicked smile to my parted lips. 
“Good,” I breathed, snaking my leg around his waist. Tighter. Higher. Closer. 
His lips traveled from my sweat-dampened neck back up to my mouth, where his tongue took no prisoners and mirrored the unwavering drives of his insanely satisfying cock. 
With one more mind-blowing, scream-inducing thrust, my body could take no more, unraveling, falling, blissfully crying out, “Oh. My. God. Yes! Yes! Yessss!” 
“Mom? Why are your cheeks so red? Why are you smiling like that? What the hell are you writing about?” 
I slapped the laptop shut and averted the wandering gaze of my ten-year-old daughter, Julie. “Language!” I scolded, pushing my Mac out of reach and taking a deep breath to clear my mind of my most current work in progress: My Step Brother’s Pick-up Truck. 
“Seriously, though. You said you were making dinner an hour ago. I’m starved!” 
And so am I, I thought. For alone time to write. For not-so-alone time to get in on some action like my based-on-me character, Jessa. 
Lately, adulting was not my forte. Especially since I was adulting solo because till death do us part became till I find myself someone younger, thinner, and blonder. Huffing as I slid off the stool at the kitchen island, I ignored all bitter thoughts about her father and reached out to finger the long waves of Julie’s golden hair. “What are you in the mood for? And don’t say sushi because you know your sister hates it.” 
Shooing my hand away, she rolled her eyes—probably for the nine hundredth time that day—and her shoulders slumped. She hates me. She totally hates me. Before she could turn away and bury her head in her phone to continue her Snapchat streak with her “squad,” I had an idea that would please even my picky children. “Breakfast for dinner?” 
You’d think I’d invented Instagram by the way she beamed. She loves me. She totally loves me. “Oh, yeah! Great idea, Mom. You have chocolate chips?”
“And whipped cream!” I grabbed the pancake batter from the pantry, rummaging for the promised chocolate chips. “Go help your sister with the rest of her reading and dinner will be ready in a jiffy.”
“A jiffy?” she snapped with a smirk. “Really, Mom? Who are you, Danny Tanner?” 
“What? What should I have said? What’s the proper lingo, oh sweet child o’ mine?” I couldn’t keep up, even though I liked to think I tried. And I wasn’t nearly as out of the loop as some of the other moms at school. But for some reason, nothing I said to Julie these days was up to par.

☆☆☆☆☆☆

MORE ABOUT #MOMFAIL

Everyone just stop for one bleeping minute so we can all get real with each other. Being a mom is some tough $#!†. You're constantly wearing questionable substances that make you ask, "is this chocolate or ... oh, crap ..." and your purse is merely a receptacle for three-week-old snacks and broken crayons.

Let's be honest ... even when we're doing this “mom” thing right, we're somehow doing it completely wrong.

Pardon us while we dust off our collective Mother of the Year trophy and proudly present you with an epic anthology of #MOMFAILS.

*Stories inspired by real life (unless you’re a cop, then it’s all complete fiction). Names and situations have been changed to protect the guilty (and by guilty, we mean the moms). Because motherhood is a battlefield and we're all just trying to survive by any means necessary.

Featuring this amazing lineup: Alissa York, A.M. Willard, BL Berry, Carina Adams, Claudia Burgoa, Crystal Burnette, Dylan Allen, Faith Andrews, Gia Riley, J.A. DeRouen, Kate Anslinger, Leddy Harper, LK Collins, LL Collins, Marie James, Piper Rayne, Riann C. Miller, Shari Ryan, Stephanie Rose, Stephie Walls, SM West, TL Swan, Teresa Michaels, and foreword written by: Nicole Kane Knepper

NOW AVAILABLE ONLY $0.99!

Amazon I B&N I iBooks I KOBO I 

Picture

☆☆☆☆☆☆

Picture
Stalk the Authors:
Shari J Ryan, A.M. Willard, Gia Riley, Carina Adams 
 
Claudia Burgoa, Crystal Grizzard Burnette, Faith Andrews,
 
J.A. Derouen, Leddy Harper, LK Collins 

Comments
    Picture

    Search our website


    Want to get up to date on Book News?  
    View past issues of our Rock Report HERE

    #FeaturedRelease


    #Featued Cover Reveal


    All
    Abby Brooks
    A. D. Justice
    A.D. McCammon
    Alana Sapphire
    Aleahta Romig
    Aleatha Romig
    Alessandra Torre
    Alexa Riley
    Alex Grayson
    Aleya Michelle
    Aly Martinez
    Alyson Santos
    Amanda Richardson
    Amie Knight
    A.M. Johnson
    A. M. Madden
    A.M. Willard
    A.M. Wilson
    Amy Andrews
    Amy Daws
    Amy Harmon
    Andrea Smith
    Angela Graham
    Angela Quarles
    Annie Rains
    Anthology
    Aria Cole
    A.S. Teague
    Aurora Rose Reynolds
    Autumn Grey
    Ava Alise
    Ava Harrison
    Balla Love-Wins
    Barbara Freethy
    Barbie Bohrman
    Beaus & Arrows
    Beck Anderson
    Becky McGraw
    Bella Love-Wins
    Beth Flynn
    Beth Michele
    Beverly Preston
    Blake Austin
    BL Berry
    Blogiversary
    Brenda Rothert
    Brenda St. John Brown
    Brooke Blaine
    Brooke Blane
    Brooke Cumberland
    Brooke O'Brien
    Brooklyn Taylor
    CA Harms
    Caisey Quinn
    Caitlyn O'Leary
    Callie Anderson
    Callie Harper
    Callie Hart
    Carina Adams
    Carly Phillips
    Carmen Jenner
    Carrie Ann Ryan
    Casey Peeler
    Cathryn Fox
    Cat Porter
    Charlotte West
    Chelle Bliss
    Christina Lauren
    Cindi Madsen
    Claudia Burgoa
    Colleen Charles
    Colleen Hoover
    Corinne Michaels
    Cover Reveal
    Crystal Kaswell
    Cynthia Page
    Dale Mayer
    Dani Wyatt
    Debra Anastasia
    Dee Palmer
    Devney Perry
    D. Kelly
    Donna Alam
    Dylan Allen
    Eden Summers
    E.K. Blair
    Elena Mattews
    Elisabeth Grace
    E.L. James
    Ella Fox
    Ella Frank
    Elle Aycart
    Elle Boon
    Elle Kennedy
    Emerson Rose
    Emma Chase
    Emma Hart
    Erin Nicholas
    Erin Noelle
    Erin Watt
    Evan Grace
    Excerpt Reveal
    Exclusive
    Faith Andrews
    Fiona Cole
    Gemma James
    Geneva Lee
    Georgia Cates
    Gia Riley
    Guest Post
    Harloe Rae
    Heather C. Leigh
    Heather D'Agostino
    Heather M. Orgeron
    Heather Stone
    Heidi McLaughlin
    Helena Hunting
    Hilary Storm
    Holly Renee
    Ilsa Madden Mills
    Ilsa Madden-Mills
    Jackie Steele
    Jade C. Jamison
    J.A. DeRouen
    Jamie Schlosser
    Jana Aston
    Jane Anthony
    Jasinda Wilder
    Jay McLean
    J.B. Hartnett
    J.C. Reed
    JC Reed
    J. Daniels
    JD Hallyfield
    Jeanine Colette
    Jen Frederick
    Jennifer Ann
    Jennifer Blackwood
    Jennifer Foor
    Jennifer Loren
    Jennifer Probst
    Jennifer Van Wyk
    Jessica Clare
    Jewel E Ann
    Jillian Dodd
    Jill Monroe
    Jill Shalvis
    J. Kenner
    J.L. Berg
    Joanna Wylde
    Jodi Watters
    Jordan Marie
    Julia Kent
    Julie A Richman
    Kacey Shea
    Kahlen Aymes
    K.A. Linde
    Karina Halle
    Kata Čuić
    Katee Robert
    Kathy Coopmans
    Katie Ashley
    Kat T. Masen
    Katy Evans
    Katy Regnery
    K. Bromberg
    Kelly Elliot
    Kendall Ryan
    Kennedy Fox
    K.I. Lynn
    KI Lynn
    Kimberly Knight
    Kimberly Readnour
    Kim Holden
    Kim Jones
    Kim Karr
    Kim Loraine
    K.K. Allen
    KK Allen
    Kristen Ashley
    Kristin Mayer
    Kylie Scott
    L.A. Cotton
    L.A. Fiore
    Lane Hart
    Laura Heffernan
    Laura Ward
    Laurelin Paige
    Lauren Blakely
    Lauren Landish
    Lauren Rowe
    Lauren Smith
    Layne Harper
    L.B. Dunbar
    Leann Ashers
    Leigh Christopher
    Leisa Rayven
    Lexi Blake
    Leylah Attar
    L.H. Cosway
    LH Cosway
    Lili Saint Germain
    Lili St. Germain
    Lindsay Cross
    Lisa DeJong
    Lisa Marie Perry
    Lisa Renee Jones
    Lisa Suzanne
    Liv Morris
    LK Collins
    L.L. Collins
    L.M. Carr
    London Casey/Jaxson Kidman
    Lulu Astor
    Lynne Silver
    Lyra Parish
    Maggie Marr
    Mandi Beck
    Mariah Dietz
    Marie Force
    Marie James
    Marni Mann
    Maya Hughes
    MC Decker
    M. Clarke
    Meghan March
    Meghan Quinn
    Melanie Moreland
    Melissa Jane
    Melissa Toppen
    Melody Grace
    Mia Asher
    Mia Kayla
    Michelle Mankin
    Missy Johnson
    M.J. Fields
    Mj Fields
    M. Never
    M.N. Forgy
    Molly McAdams
    #MOMFAIL
    Monica James
    Monica Murphy
    Nalini Singh
    Nana Malone
    Nashoda Rose
    Natasha Madison
    Nicola Rendell
    Nicole Blanchard
    Nicole Richard
    Nikki Ash
    Nikki Belaire
    Nina Malone
    N. Isabelle Blanco
    Official Fifty
    Penelope Ward
    Penny Reid
    Pepper Winters
    Piper Rayne
    Rachael Duncan
    Rachel Blaufeld
    Rachel Robinson
    Rachel Van Dyken
    Raine Miller
    RC Boldt
    R.C. Stephens
    RC Stephens
    Rebecca Jenshak
    Rebecca Shea
    Rebecca Yarros
    Red Phoenix
    Renee Carlino
    R.K. Lilley
    Robin Bielman
    Rowan Underwood
    Roya Carmen
    Sandra Marton
    Sarah Castille
    Sarah Robinson
    Sarina Bowen
    Savannah Stewart
    Sawyer Bennett
    S.E. Hall
    SE Hall
    Shari J. Ryan
    Shayla Black
    Shay Savage
    Sheri Lee Gray
    Sherilee Gray
    Shiloh Walker
    Sidney Halston
    Sienna Parks
    Sierra Hill
    Skye Turner
    S.L. Jennings
    Sloane Murphy
    S.L. Scott
    S.M. Shade
    Sneak Peek: Intertwined By Sasha Brümmer
    Sophia Henry
    Stacy Kestwick
    Stasia Black
    Stephie Walls
    Stylo Fantome
    Sunniva Dee
    Sylvain Reynard
    Tali Alexander
    T. Bester
    Teagan Hunter
    Teagan Kade
    Tess Hunter
    The Darcy Monologues
    Tia Louise
    Tijan
    Tillie Cole
    T.L. Smith
    T.L. Swan
    T.M. Frazier
    Toni Aleo
    Tracie Podger
    Tracy Wolff
    T.R. Cupak
    Trisha Wolfe
    Vi Keeland
    Winter Renshaw

    RSS Feed





Don't miss a thing!  Subscribe to our Rock Report to receive a daily email.
Giveaway Terms | New Releases | Authors | Genres | Privacy |  Amazon Affiliate Disclosure

Live Chat Support ×

Connecting

You: ::content::
::agent_name:: ::content::
::content::
::content::
✕