Evey is in love with her alcoholic guardian angel in Lucian Divine by Renee Carlino is NOW LIVE!
Read a First Look of this upcoming Paranormal Romance and you just might fall for Lucian too!
He is absolutely divine!
Read a First Look of this upcoming Paranormal Romance and you just might fall for Lucian too!
He is absolutely divine!
“Oh Christ, oh God, what is she doing?” I was barreling toward her so fast I could feel my wings cramping.
She had said my name. I had been lost, tormented, looking everywhere for her. I’d gone to the apartment, but she was gone. Abigail had no idea where Evey was. She mumbled something about Evey leaving really early to go do denim for Tracey. Abigail wouldn’t even look up from her phone to talk to me. I wanted to slap her for not caring. Cursing loudly, I flew to the warehouse, but it was empty. I headed toward the bridge, and that was when I heard Evey say my name.
I was flying toward her. She was leaning over the guardrail almost entirely, her feet dangling off the ground. I pushed the air toward her. She gasped and found her footing back on the walkway. I sat perched on the railing, poised and ready to react. I wondered what she was doing. She squinted, staring straight forward, then she jumped up and dangled over the railing again, farther this time. I popped into a body walking by and appeared behind her. It was a male, attractive, around her age.
“Hey there, what are you doing? That looks dangerous,” I said to her.
Her body stiffened, and her feet hit the ground. She waited five whole seconds before turning around and looking at me. Taking a step closer, she stared into my eyes. Her mouth was slack, as if she couldn’t find her voice.
“Do you want me to call someone for you?” I asked.
She stepped even closer. She was studying me with intense focus. “I know it’s you,” she said quietly, barely loud enough for a normal person to hear over the wind and traffic.
“Excuse me?” I said.
“I know you’re in there, Lucian.”
I blinked. Fuck. “Sweetie, I think I should call someone for you.”
“I can smell you. I can tell it’s you.”
I hadn’t zapped her good enough. It occurred to me that I could zap her again in that moment, but I didn’t. She reached for my hand, but I pulled it back. I was going to try to convince her.
“What is your name?”
“You know my name,” she shot back. “I remember. It’s like a foggy dream. We held each other, but I remember. You were in my house, in my bed. I know it’s true.”
It was hard to continue lying to her. “Do you have a car in the parking lot that I can walk you to?”
“If you don’t know me at all, why don’t you leave me alone?”
“I’m concerned for you. You seem troubled. And you’re basically hanging off this enormous bridge. It’s dangerous.”
“Leave me alone,” she said.
I needed to try a different approach. I smiled, fairly certain this guy had a nice enough face. She didn’t smile back. “It’s not every day you see a gorgeous woman dangling precariously over the rail of the Golden Gate.”
“I’m no damsel in distress.”
“No?” I couldn’t take my eyes off of her mouth.
She came closer. What is she doing? She leaned forward.
“Kiss me, Lucian,” she whispered near my ear. “I want you to kiss me, but I want it to be Lucian.”
I couldn’t control it. I couldn’t stop myself. I couldn’t deny her.
When I left the stranger’s body and revealed myself to her, our mouths collided. We were kissing, our tongues twisting, our hands going everywhere. I spread my wings as far and wide as I could to wrap them around us as we kissed. We were cloaked, invisible to the rest of the world. Only Evey could see that we were cocooned by a curtain of black feathers.
She pulled away from my mouth, breathless. She was putty in my arms.
“I want you,” she said. “I want you inside of me.”
Zack’s voice echoed in my mind. The only way you can be together is to take her out.
“Did you hear me? I want to be with you,” she said before kissing me again.
I pulled away. “Like have sex?”
“Yes. That, and I want to be with you forever. I don’t know how I know that. I just do. I’m in love with you, aren’t I? And you did something to me?”
“It’s a mind trick, Evey. You’re meant to feel that way toward me.” We were still huddled inside my wings.
“If we can’t be together, I’ll jump and you won’t be able to stop me. I can feel in your fingertips how much you love me.”
I touched her cheek and ran my fingertips down her jawline. It was true. Every cell in my body ached for her.
“Ahh, touch me everywhere, Lucian, please.”
I kissed her hard. Her legs gave out. I held her body to mine. “Do you trust me?” I asked.
“More than anyone.”
It pained me to hear that, knowing what I was about to do.
I flew up off the bridge, still holding Evey. She nestled into my chest like a sleeping baby, and I pressed my mouth to hers. She opened her eyes as we began falling fast toward the water. There was no fear in her body… yet. We kissed as we plummeted under the surface of the rigid bay water. Down and down we went, still kissing. I knew she wasn’t breathing. I wasn’t breathing either, but I could hold my breath for fifteen minutes—long enough to end Evey’s life as a human.
After a minute, I started to feel her fear. She pulled away; her eyes were open and pleading. I held her tightly to my body. She began to gasp. She held onto my neck as she breathed in water. Her body began to jerk. She put her mouth on mine, seeking comfort. When she started convulsing, I gave up. That was it. I couldn’t do it. I braced her against me and shot straight out of the water. I blew breaths into her mouth until she coughed. I was flying to her apartment as fast as I could.
Evey was out of it, trembling and gasping for air. “Why?” she tried to say as she coughed uncontrollably.
I got her into the apartment unnoticed. I carried her to the bathroom and started a warm bath. Her teeth were chattering as she tried to speak again. “Why?”
Standing her on her weak legs, I stripped her clothes from her shaking, blue body. “I’m so sorry,” I said. My voice sounded like a cry. I picked up her naked body and placed her in the tub. She had the utmost trust for me still. I couldn’t understand it.
Rubbing her arms and legs to warm her up, I chanted over and over, “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. Take me, God, I can’t bear this.”
As if it weren’t enough that I had almost killed the only living being that had ever meant anything to me, I was also feeling the intense effects of alcohol withdrawal. I was almost convulsing myself, and I was tortured by what I had done. All I could do was stare hopelessly into Evey’s trusting, chocolaty eyes, so warm and so innocent. What had I done?
“Take me, God,” I said again.
“Stop saying that, Lucian, please. I’m okay. I just don’t understand anything. Are you shaking because you’re cold? You can come in here with me.”
I shook my head. “I’ll tell you everything, but not right now. Right now we need to warm you up. I should not have done that. It was a mistake. I’m sorry. I promise I won’t keep anything from you ever again.” I owed it to her to tell her as much as I knew, and I planned to do just that.
After dressing her and carrying her to bed, I lay down beside her and stroked her hair. Her eyes were closed, but she was awake. She curled into my body, so I held her closer. I tightened my grip. I would never let her go.
“I feel like I’m on drugs when I’m with you,” she said near my ear.
In a low voice, I told her, “I am so in love with you, Evey, but I can’t be with you. I’m not allowed. You’re in love with me because I am made to make you feel that way. I was never supposed to let you see me. Another angel told me that if I took your life, you would become like me and that we could be together.”
“Do it,” she said quietly.
She’s going crazy. I caused this. “I told you why you feel that way. Please don’t be reckless. I could never go through with it. It hurts so badly to say this, but we can never be together. I have to protect you. Don’t you see that? I tried today, and it was the worst feeling I’ve ever had. I don’t see how it would be possible.”
“So what are you saying? That you’ll try to make me forget you again? That I’ll go on with the rest of my life with you hanging around while I have dreams of you… while I ache for you?” She remembered everything. I didn’t know how I could make her forget. I was in unchartered territory.
“I ache for you. I’ve ached for you for so long. Since you’ve grown up, I’ve wanted to be with you. When you were young, I wanted to teach you everything about the world. I wanted to protect you. I still do, and this is the only way I can. I have to follow the rules so that I can be here for you forever.”
She laced her fingers between mine. “You’re warm. Why are you trembling?”
“I’m an alcoholic,” I told her.
Her eyes opened wide. “You are?”
I nodded.
“You’re so human,” she said, “so flawed. I love you more because of it.”
“I know it feels that way, but I’m not human. Flawed, yes, but not human.”
“I can help you get sober, if that’s what you want. We can be together. What’s going to happen if we’re together?” she asked.
I knew she could. Not being able to have her was half of the reason I drank, or maybe it was the whole reason I drank. “I don’t know what will happen, but I’m too scared to find out. I don’t want to risk your life anymore.”
“I’ll never get over you,” she said.
We kissed again.
She removed my T-shirt and ran her hand down the muscles of my back. “They’re gone. You’re so human.”
She took off her own clothes, and I didn’t stop her. I just looked on in awe. Why hadn’t Mona shown up? Why hadn’t someone intervened?
We were naked, and I took her in, running my hands up her smooth sides, cupping her breasts, teasing her. Things sped up, and we were kissing frantically. I put my hand between her legs and touched her.
“Ahh, Lucian. Make love to me.”
“I’m going to.”
She had said my name. I had been lost, tormented, looking everywhere for her. I’d gone to the apartment, but she was gone. Abigail had no idea where Evey was. She mumbled something about Evey leaving really early to go do denim for Tracey. Abigail wouldn’t even look up from her phone to talk to me. I wanted to slap her for not caring. Cursing loudly, I flew to the warehouse, but it was empty. I headed toward the bridge, and that was when I heard Evey say my name.
I was flying toward her. She was leaning over the guardrail almost entirely, her feet dangling off the ground. I pushed the air toward her. She gasped and found her footing back on the walkway. I sat perched on the railing, poised and ready to react. I wondered what she was doing. She squinted, staring straight forward, then she jumped up and dangled over the railing again, farther this time. I popped into a body walking by and appeared behind her. It was a male, attractive, around her age.
“Hey there, what are you doing? That looks dangerous,” I said to her.
Her body stiffened, and her feet hit the ground. She waited five whole seconds before turning around and looking at me. Taking a step closer, she stared into my eyes. Her mouth was slack, as if she couldn’t find her voice.
“Do you want me to call someone for you?” I asked.
She stepped even closer. She was studying me with intense focus. “I know it’s you,” she said quietly, barely loud enough for a normal person to hear over the wind and traffic.
“Excuse me?” I said.
“I know you’re in there, Lucian.”
I blinked. Fuck. “Sweetie, I think I should call someone for you.”
“I can smell you. I can tell it’s you.”
I hadn’t zapped her good enough. It occurred to me that I could zap her again in that moment, but I didn’t. She reached for my hand, but I pulled it back. I was going to try to convince her.
“What is your name?”
“You know my name,” she shot back. “I remember. It’s like a foggy dream. We held each other, but I remember. You were in my house, in my bed. I know it’s true.”
It was hard to continue lying to her. “Do you have a car in the parking lot that I can walk you to?”
“If you don’t know me at all, why don’t you leave me alone?”
“I’m concerned for you. You seem troubled. And you’re basically hanging off this enormous bridge. It’s dangerous.”
“Leave me alone,” she said.
I needed to try a different approach. I smiled, fairly certain this guy had a nice enough face. She didn’t smile back. “It’s not every day you see a gorgeous woman dangling precariously over the rail of the Golden Gate.”
“I’m no damsel in distress.”
“No?” I couldn’t take my eyes off of her mouth.
She came closer. What is she doing? She leaned forward.
“Kiss me, Lucian,” she whispered near my ear. “I want you to kiss me, but I want it to be Lucian.”
I couldn’t control it. I couldn’t stop myself. I couldn’t deny her.
When I left the stranger’s body and revealed myself to her, our mouths collided. We were kissing, our tongues twisting, our hands going everywhere. I spread my wings as far and wide as I could to wrap them around us as we kissed. We were cloaked, invisible to the rest of the world. Only Evey could see that we were cocooned by a curtain of black feathers.
She pulled away from my mouth, breathless. She was putty in my arms.
“I want you,” she said. “I want you inside of me.”
Zack’s voice echoed in my mind. The only way you can be together is to take her out.
“Did you hear me? I want to be with you,” she said before kissing me again.
I pulled away. “Like have sex?”
“Yes. That, and I want to be with you forever. I don’t know how I know that. I just do. I’m in love with you, aren’t I? And you did something to me?”
“It’s a mind trick, Evey. You’re meant to feel that way toward me.” We were still huddled inside my wings.
“If we can’t be together, I’ll jump and you won’t be able to stop me. I can feel in your fingertips how much you love me.”
I touched her cheek and ran my fingertips down her jawline. It was true. Every cell in my body ached for her.
“Ahh, touch me everywhere, Lucian, please.”
I kissed her hard. Her legs gave out. I held her body to mine. “Do you trust me?” I asked.
“More than anyone.”
It pained me to hear that, knowing what I was about to do.
I flew up off the bridge, still holding Evey. She nestled into my chest like a sleeping baby, and I pressed my mouth to hers. She opened her eyes as we began falling fast toward the water. There was no fear in her body… yet. We kissed as we plummeted under the surface of the rigid bay water. Down and down we went, still kissing. I knew she wasn’t breathing. I wasn’t breathing either, but I could hold my breath for fifteen minutes—long enough to end Evey’s life as a human.
After a minute, I started to feel her fear. She pulled away; her eyes were open and pleading. I held her tightly to my body. She began to gasp. She held onto my neck as she breathed in water. Her body began to jerk. She put her mouth on mine, seeking comfort. When she started convulsing, I gave up. That was it. I couldn’t do it. I braced her against me and shot straight out of the water. I blew breaths into her mouth until she coughed. I was flying to her apartment as fast as I could.
Evey was out of it, trembling and gasping for air. “Why?” she tried to say as she coughed uncontrollably.
I got her into the apartment unnoticed. I carried her to the bathroom and started a warm bath. Her teeth were chattering as she tried to speak again. “Why?”
Standing her on her weak legs, I stripped her clothes from her shaking, blue body. “I’m so sorry,” I said. My voice sounded like a cry. I picked up her naked body and placed her in the tub. She had the utmost trust for me still. I couldn’t understand it.
Rubbing her arms and legs to warm her up, I chanted over and over, “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. Take me, God, I can’t bear this.”
As if it weren’t enough that I had almost killed the only living being that had ever meant anything to me, I was also feeling the intense effects of alcohol withdrawal. I was almost convulsing myself, and I was tortured by what I had done. All I could do was stare hopelessly into Evey’s trusting, chocolaty eyes, so warm and so innocent. What had I done?
“Take me, God,” I said again.
“Stop saying that, Lucian, please. I’m okay. I just don’t understand anything. Are you shaking because you’re cold? You can come in here with me.”
I shook my head. “I’ll tell you everything, but not right now. Right now we need to warm you up. I should not have done that. It was a mistake. I’m sorry. I promise I won’t keep anything from you ever again.” I owed it to her to tell her as much as I knew, and I planned to do just that.
After dressing her and carrying her to bed, I lay down beside her and stroked her hair. Her eyes were closed, but she was awake. She curled into my body, so I held her closer. I tightened my grip. I would never let her go.
“I feel like I’m on drugs when I’m with you,” she said near my ear.
In a low voice, I told her, “I am so in love with you, Evey, but I can’t be with you. I’m not allowed. You’re in love with me because I am made to make you feel that way. I was never supposed to let you see me. Another angel told me that if I took your life, you would become like me and that we could be together.”
“Do it,” she said quietly.
She’s going crazy. I caused this. “I told you why you feel that way. Please don’t be reckless. I could never go through with it. It hurts so badly to say this, but we can never be together. I have to protect you. Don’t you see that? I tried today, and it was the worst feeling I’ve ever had. I don’t see how it would be possible.”
“So what are you saying? That you’ll try to make me forget you again? That I’ll go on with the rest of my life with you hanging around while I have dreams of you… while I ache for you?” She remembered everything. I didn’t know how I could make her forget. I was in unchartered territory.
“I ache for you. I’ve ached for you for so long. Since you’ve grown up, I’ve wanted to be with you. When you were young, I wanted to teach you everything about the world. I wanted to protect you. I still do, and this is the only way I can. I have to follow the rules so that I can be here for you forever.”
She laced her fingers between mine. “You’re warm. Why are you trembling?”
“I’m an alcoholic,” I told her.
Her eyes opened wide. “You are?”
I nodded.
“You’re so human,” she said, “so flawed. I love you more because of it.”
“I know it feels that way, but I’m not human. Flawed, yes, but not human.”
“I can help you get sober, if that’s what you want. We can be together. What’s going to happen if we’re together?” she asked.
I knew she could. Not being able to have her was half of the reason I drank, or maybe it was the whole reason I drank. “I don’t know what will happen, but I’m too scared to find out. I don’t want to risk your life anymore.”
“I’ll never get over you,” she said.
We kissed again.
She removed my T-shirt and ran her hand down the muscles of my back. “They’re gone. You’re so human.”
She took off her own clothes, and I didn’t stop her. I just looked on in awe. Why hadn’t Mona shown up? Why hadn’t someone intervened?
We were naked, and I took her in, running my hands up her smooth sides, cupping her breasts, teasing her. Things sped up, and we were kissing frantically. I put my hand between her legs and touched her.
“Ahh, Lucian. Make love to me.”
“I’m going to.”
✰✰✰✰✰✰
About this book
“My guardian angel is a drunk.”
Evelyn Casey's life is at a standstill. She's in her mid-twenties, struggling with the dating scene in San Francisco. Nothing seems to be working out, and she’s starting to think that she’ll live out her days in her crummy apartment with her overbearing roommate, Brooklyn. It's absurd, but sometimes Evey longs for a guardian angel to show up and save the day.
And then he does. Seriously. His name is Lucian and he's a guardian angel, been on the job for two thousand years. His sudden presence in her life is both good—he's brilliant, witty, and warm—and bad—he's brilliant, witty, warm, and hot as ----. But as perfect as Lucian seems, he’s got problems of his own. He’s taken up drinking and he’s brazenly inserted himself into Evey’s life, going against the greatest cosmic law ever created.
For Evey, the rules are simple: You are not allowed to hook up with your guardian angel. But sometimes fulfilling your destiny requires a leap of faith, a confrontation with God.
Yes, God as in God.
“My guardian angel is a drunk.”
Evelyn Casey's life is at a standstill. She's in her mid-twenties, struggling with the dating scene in San Francisco. Nothing seems to be working out, and she’s starting to think that she’ll live out her days in her crummy apartment with her overbearing roommate, Brooklyn. It's absurd, but sometimes Evey longs for a guardian angel to show up and save the day.
And then he does. Seriously. His name is Lucian and he's a guardian angel, been on the job for two thousand years. His sudden presence in her life is both good—he's brilliant, witty, and warm—and bad—he's brilliant, witty, warm, and hot as ----. But as perfect as Lucian seems, he’s got problems of his own. He’s taken up drinking and he’s brazenly inserted himself into Evey’s life, going against the greatest cosmic law ever created.
For Evey, the rules are simple: You are not allowed to hook up with your guardian angel. But sometimes fulfilling your destiny requires a leap of faith, a confrontation with God.
Yes, God as in God.
Renée Carlino is a screenwriter and bestselling author of contemporary women's novels and new adult fiction. Her books have been featured in national publications, including USA TODAY, Huffington Post, Latina magazine, and Publisher's Weekly. She lives in Southern California with her husband, two sons, and their sweet dog June. When she's not at the beach with her boys or working on her next project, she likes to spend her time reading, going to concerts, and eating dark chocolate. Learn more at www.reneecarlino.com
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